Yes. Super Dilated = Big Blur.

This is a very friendly and efficient place, at least first thing in the morning. I walked in, gave my name, asked for a copy of the report from the last visit, announced I was going to the ladies room, came back, report was handed to me and someone was waiting to take me back to the next waiting area. Five minutes, tops.

Two minutes later I was in a small room giving updated history info, near and far vision check, drops, pressure check and then the dilation drops. Waiting room again.

I was reading a book on my iPod Touch when I decided to check out the drawing apps I had on it. There was a convenient elderly lady with a not so elderly man. Using Zen Brush I sketched her and then I was taken into another room to have pictures taken.

The man with the old lady in the drawing below is another man because when I came back the waiting room was crowded and I sat opposite someone else. I decided to stick him with her.

So then I decided to sketch the same guy using Sketch Club vector tool with “fill” turned off. Now, realize that everyone else is sitting for a few minutes, being taken somewhere, returning etc., just as I am. I’m a bit fuzzy as to the sequence because things became dramatic. I think I had seen the doctor and drew the guy after that and before I went to another room for more pictures requiring two different injected fluids.

Then I was called into another room. This one had the mirror, in which they flash the letter chart, positioned such that I could see myself as I sat waiting for the doctor to reappear. How could I resist. I forgot that Sketji does not go from the iPod Touch to iPat nicely.

It was a magnificent day and I was feeling really good. I had plans for how I was going to spend the rest of the day. But my mood shifted. I don’t know why.

He told me this and that, etc., etc. He said he wants to get the opinion of his colleague and do I mind waiting because he’s with another patient. Sure. No problem. I opened Sketch Club and turned “fill” back on. He saw this one and made me show it to everyone who entered the room. “And she did this with blurry eyes!”, he exclaimed.

Colleague concurred with his opinion so, after he told me what he wanted to do RIGHT NOW, and after I pretty much screamed “YUCK!!!!”, I did the final self-portrait in ArtRage using oil paint and actually drawing the lines as the last step, while I waited for the gathering of Lots More Drops and a sharp thing.

Feel free to cringe and shout YUCK yourself.

He said, aside from the built-in Yuck Factor of the whole procedure, it would only take a few seconds. I warned him that there was a likelihood that I would turn white due to a vasovagal thingy and he should keep an eye on me. A few seconds later I asked if I was still pink. Yes. All is well. The assistant washes out my eye with saline a few times but it still stings from all the attention it has gotten. She says she will come back and wash it out a few more times and leaves. I sit there patiently waiting.

And then I become the star in my own personal drama.
Uh oh.
Tunnel vision.
Legs feel weird. If I were to stand up I would hit the floor. I know that for sure.
I sort of stick my head in the vicinity of between my knees but my waistband suddenly feels tight, the chair position is awkward. I start to drip drip drip sweat from every pore I own.
Am I breathing funny? Or just being dramatic since I’m alone? “Hello? Can someone come here?”
Clarence the technician comes in. “I’m going to faint”. He adjusts the chair and goes to get the assistant. She brings me water. I don’t want it. I’ll throw it back up. (How embarrassing would that be? I look around for a garbage can.)
She gets a nurse (or nurse substitute) who sees Clammy Sweaty Grey-Complexioned Me and knows just what to do. Take off hoodie. An ice pack behind my neck, lots of water, check blood pressure. I feel better. I’m not sweating anymore.

The Silver Lining: She brings me a Whole Package of special super delicious cookies. Yum.

Epilogue: I left on my own two feet – the vasovagal episode, for me, is self limiting and I have never fainted from it since, so far, I have recognized that I better sit down quick. After I left I got a coffee and something to eat but since my eye was so irritated and it was already 1:00, I decided to curtail my plans and I ate with my eyes closed, walked down Fifth Avenue with my eyes closed, crossed streets without getting run over and managed to get to Penn Station in one piece. My other eye closed in sympathy. My eyes didn’t want to look at anything. The eyes stayed closed for the 40 minute train ride and, like magic, felt better all of a sudden.

But, gee whiz, I had planned on walking all over the city doing loads of sketches.

iPod Touch; New Trent Arcadia stylus.
Apps Used: (if you haven’t been paying attention)
Zen Brush, Sketch Club, Sketji, ArtRage